Two In a Jersey

Another in an endless series of fine Grimpin' days brought out Mama, Diesel, Birdman, Fat Cat and the return of Goldfish. Just to spice things up a bit, Fat Cat and Birdman trotted out a tandem, even though they had never ridden one together before. It promised to be quite the spectacle, well- even more a spectacle than two men in spandex, one polka-dotted, bound together by an aluminum pipe.

 So, everyone knows that a tandem is hopelessly slow uphill. Thus Fatty and Birdman were resigned to a future of clumsily trudging up Snake Hill and into Masontown followed by being asked to take the podium photo. But, au contraire mon freire...s. The tandem sung beneath the two riders who were seemingly born to it. It followed only the lithe and feather-like goldfish up to the WMA sign and was just behind him on the next rise. After that, four pounding pistons pumped in unison leading a grim procession of chasers. Diesel hung on gamely until the little downhill after Mayfield, at which time the combined heft of Birdman and Fat Cat harnessed the earths gravity like a spacecraft on a jovian slingshot. They rocketed across the ridge, disturbing the mountain folk with several sonic booms. In the blink of an eye, they found themselves alone in Masontown with a 16mph avs and a dual place atop the podium. Diesel claimed the 2nd spot and Goldfish rounded out the podium.

After that the Grimp settled down, as always. The group enjoyed the sunshine while alarming the locals on the Born loop with the site of two "funny fellows" on a bicycle built for two. The tandem hit a white knuckle 54 mph down Summer School before the Grimpeurs went their separate ways in Sabraton.

STANDINGS:
Fat Cat: 13
Mama: 11
Birdman: 11
Diesel: 9
Goldfish: 3
Highlander: 1

One Last Ride Across The Snow Line

Four riders lined up at the bottom of the fabled slopes of Mud Pike with temperatures in the high 30's. Diesel, Mama, Birdman and Fat Cat pedaled off at the starting gun with measured strokes. The grass along the bottom land was flush with the green of spring though the skies were a cool blue.

The lower slopes of the mountain were taken at conversatioal pace, each Grimpeur waiting to see who would make the first move. Fat Cat called a sprint from the spring to the next decrease in grade (the top of Charybdis) just for fun. From then on the pace was a bit higher, but still not punative. Fat Cat led the way, slowly ratcheting up the pace. On Baby Bear, Diesel started to fall back and Birdman unhitched from his wheel and connected with Fat Cat. On Mama Bear, Birman made a heroic move and shot ahead of Fatty. He had 30 lengths before The Cat had time to react.

As the shoots of spring began to wither under a thin blanket of snow, so too did Birdman's escape. Fat Cat kept up a steady threshold pace and and slowly rose above the flagging Grimpeur like the inexorable tide swallowing some forgotten beachhead.



In the end it was The Fat Cat of Flanders in a roll across win. He slipped on the fabled pois a rouges for the first time on top of his old nemesis, Mud Pike. He was quite full of himself

After Fat Cat basked in his own glory, the Grimp rode around and down the backside of the ridge. They took on the formidable sister climb to The Pike, Kirby Road, for a double leg twister extravaganza.

The standings shook out as follows:

Mama: 9

Fat Cat: 8

Birdman: 6

Diesel: 5

Highlander: 1

Jump in before it gets out of hand. Special dispensations/ points can be had if you know the right people.

Grimpeurs Storm The Morgantown Road Race

Here are the Grimpeur standings for The Morgantown Road Race this weekend past. Excellent work out there! I'll get a race account out when I can. Don't forget Mud Pike Thursday.

Morgantown road race grimpeur results

Gunnar Shogren 2:11:03                           22.22 avs
Don “Birdman” Dickerson 2:21:54          20.54 avs
Matt “Magnus” Kettering 2:22:03
John “The Guru” Bowders 2:22:04
Scott “The Phantom” Benson 2:26:19
Craig “Fat Cat” Weimer 2:30:25              19.41avs
VeloBetsy Shogren 2:33:14
Traci Rodosta 2:33:14
Randy “Diesel” Mansberger  2:43:54      17.75 avs
Jay “Greenie” Downs 2:44:10

 Other Notables:

Nate Annon 2:04:33
Gary Rodosta 2:15:56
Fritz Kessler2:32:02
Stephanie Swan 2:33:14
Marco Picerelli 2:36:51

Mama: Part Duex

The wily one, Brahma Mama, did it again. She outfoxed her fellow Grimpeurs, Fat Cat and Birdman, on the course from the bottom of The Snake to the top at Mayfield. This time she didn't jump up from behind. She led the little peleton from the start and lulled them into conversation. Before they knew it, her siren like tones had clouded the eyes of her competitors. Mama made no sudden moves to break her spell until she crossed the finish and raised an arm in triumph. Fat Cat and Birdman woke from their hypnoses, dumbfounded to be at the finish.

The rest of the ride consisted of a reverse herring loop capped off with a jaunt down the rail trail from Masontown. Congratulations to Mama on her second week in polka-dots. See you next week at The Pike.

How to justify your exercise habit

The readers of this blog, few as they may be, may or may not know the reason behind its resurgence of late, after some time in hiatus. Let's review.

The Fat Cat of Flanders had, as is often the case, let himself go. It was precisely at the depths of his descent that his wife (being a medical doctor) insisted that he have his cholesterol checked. An ever obedient Fat Cat dragged his 220 lb frame into the clinic at WVU and came out with a bad report card (Bad stuff way high, good stuff: not so good). These events led to his wife insisting that he commence medications. Problem: Fat Cat (being a chiropractor) did not want to take the medication. So, it was agreed that Fat Cat could try and get his numbers down through whatever voodoo and alchemy he chose to employ, and when that failed; he would get on the drugs. Thus Fat Cat got back on the bicycle and back in the Grimp (and gave plenty of fodder for web posts). He also made dietary alterations involving soy isoflavones, plant phenols, omega3 fatty acids, bulk fiber etc., all in the form of whole foods such as berries, nuts, leafy vegetables, whole grains, fish and the like. Basically, if it had been shown in studies to lower LDL cholesterol or raise HDL by a few percent, it was incorporated (excluding things like red rice yeast which basically contain the same chemical in the drugs). None of the nutrients were obtained by supplement pills.

So what happened? In 10 months the total cholesterol was lowered 50 points (18 percent), LDL cholesterol was lowered 56 points (28%), HDL-good cholesterol- was increased 11 points (24%) and triglycerides-which were the only thing in normal rages on the initial test- were decreased 24 points(25%).

So next time someone gives you the stink eye about time on your bike (not that Fat Cat had been subjected to such) or about skipping the cheeseburger for a spinach and tofu burrito, don't feel guilty. You don't just deserve it- you NEED it.