Thursday, December 15, 2011

It IS about the bike


No offense to Lance, but he don't know squat. Five Grimpeurs made it out in the wind and rain Thursday. It was a day for bike changes. Mama showed up at The Botanical Gardens on her man's red Cannondale. Fat Cat blew in on Kean's time machine.

Fatty didn't intend to ride the lightning. This was a machine unaccustomed to losing. The stalwart blue soloist was the rain bike of choice. However, 10:00 snuck up and the soloist's chain hung broken from her cogs. Apparently, a quick link is anything but in the wrong hands. The R3 screamed "Pick me!" while the Colnago cross lay in the corner, fat and unenthusiastic.

Well, there must have been some magic in that carbon bike he found. For when he placed it on the hill it began to dance around. The R3 launched up Snake Hill and never looked back. wheezing and grunts could be heard from behind but only clear road was ahead.

Of course, Fat Cat was sure he would be swallowed up by the chase. Kean's bike would have none of it. They crested the usual finish in the lead with Big Daddy a few lengths behind. Fat Cat raised his hands, happy having won the first battle in the war for Mayfield and the new finish line. The R3 had just begun.

The next climb came. The Cat remembered Kean's advice to rip it off like a band-aid and hit it in the big ring. The bike reverberated with the echos of past glories and jumped ahead. The Cat's legs caught fire and his finger twitched on the down shifter. The digit was stayed by a voice from the past, "Stay in the big ring!"

The pace left an over-dressed Diesel over heated and cooked. Big Daddy Birdman gave it all he had but his cross bike was no match for the sublime power of the Kean's time machine. The Flanders Fat Cat reached the Mayfield finish line and a first time in the polka-dots 31 seconds ahead of Birdman. Diesel crossed the line a minute thirty after that. In another surprise, Razor took the women's division. Mama brought up the lantern with pride.

The overall shakes out like this:

1) Diesel- 89
2) Fat Cat- 71
3) Birdman- 58
4) Legs- 56
5) Boyscout- 47
6) Sandbag- 45
7)Mama- 40
8) Tallboy- 18
9) Razor- 9
9) Fixie- 9
9) Trip- 9
12) Highlander- 6
13) Knickers- 5
13) Chunks- 5

Afterwards all ambled about together and made their way around to the Zion climb. From there it was back down the Snake and back to the Gardens.

Thanks to all that came out in the rain and had some fun. A big thanks to my lovely wife who actually encouraged me to get out and ride Thursday. What a woman. And don't forget kiddies, magic does happen at Christmas time. Thanks Kean.

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